Yankovic Weird Al - Albuquerque

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File info:

Band name Yankovic Weird Al
Song name Albuquerque
Tab type Guitar tab
Added 07/14/2008
Size 21.8 kb
File format
Views/Loads 0/1
Rating
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Song:       Albuquerque

Artist:     Weird Al Yankovic

CD:         Running With Scissors

Copyright:  1999 Volcano Entertainment

Tabbed For: Electric Guitar

Tabbed By:  Tim Fehr



Ok this is one of the coolest songs I've ever heard its long but 

Really funny. It dosent take a looser to play it but it takes one

To sing it. I'm not sure about any of the solos cuz their really fast 

and I don't do that kinda stuff. So help would be nice.For this song you 

might want to know the chords that are used. Because frankly I don't 

use them that often.



   F         B        Fm7?      Bm7

E--1--    E--1--    E--1--    E--1--

B--1--    B--3--    B--1--    B--2--

G--2--    G--3--    G--1--    G--1--

D--3--    D--3--    D--1--    D--3--

A--3--    A--1--    A--3--    A--1--

E--1--    E--1--    E--1--    E--1--



E-13-13-13-13-13-13-13-13-13-13-13-8h10p8-|-------------|

B-------------|-------------|-------------|--10---------|

G-------------|-------------|-------------|-----10------|

D-------------|-------------|-------------|-------------|

A-------------|-------------|-------------|-------------|

E-------------|-------------|-------------|-------------|

                                                       F F

Way back when I was just a little bitty boy living in a box under the

                                          F F

stairs in the corner of the basement of the house half a block down the 

                           F F

street from Jerry?s Bait Shop? You know the place? Well anyway, back then 

         F F                                   F F

life was going swell and everything was juuuuust peachy? except of course 

                 F F                                F F

for the undeniable fact that every single morning my mother would make me 

                                F F                       F  F   

a big old bowl of sauerkraut for breakfast. Daaaaaaaouh! Big bowl of 

 F    F 

sauerkraut!

E-13------------|

B---13p10-------|

G--------10-----| F       F       F                              F F

D---------------| Every single morning! It was driving me crazy. I said to 

A---------------|

E---------------|



                                                    F F

my mom, I said, ?Hey mom, what?s up with all the sauerkraut?? And my dear 

                     F F                                               F F

sweet mother she just looked at me like a cow looks at an oncoming train. 

                                                           F  F  F  F

And she leaned right down next to me, and she said, ?It?s good for you!? 

B B B B               F        F         F      F     B      B        B

        And then she tied me to the wall and stuck a funnel in my mouth 

     B        F   F  F   F     B      B        B         B         F  F

and force-fed me nothing but sauerkraut until I was twenty-six and a half 

                                    F F

years old. That?s when I swore that someday, someday I would get out of 

                   F F                                         F              

that basement and travel to a magical far away place where the sun is 

                        B                            F 

always shining and the air smells like warm root beer and the towels are 

            B            F                                  B     

oh so fluffy, where the shriners and the lepers play their ukulele?s all 

              F                              B                       

day long and anyone on the street?ll gladly shave you?re back for a 

 F       B  B    B B   F                              

nickel. Wakawakadoodoo yah! Well let me tell you people, that it wasn?t 

                     F F                                       F F

long at all before my dream came true because the very next day a local 

                                                F F

radio station had this contest to see who could correctly guess the number 

                      F F                                           F F

of molecules in Leonard Neroy?s butt. I was off by three but I still won

                              F F

the grand prize. That?s right a first class one-way ticket, to 

F Fm7 B Bm7   F       B F F Fm7 B Bm7   F       B

A     -    lbuquerque,   A     -     lbuquerque! Ah yah, you know I never 

                                    F F 

been on a real airplane before and I gotta tell ya it was really great.

F F                                               F F

Except that I had to ist between two large Albanian women with 

                                        F F

excruciatingly severe body odour and the little kid in back of me kept 

                          F F

throwing up the whole time. The flight attendants ran out of Dr. Pepper 

                 F F                                                   F F

and salted peanuts and the in flight movie was "Biodome" with Polly Shore.

                                                              F         

And oh yah three of the airplane's engines burned down and we went into a

             B                                 F 

tailspin and crashed into a hillside and the plane exploded in a giant 

 B             F                                                    F

fireball and everybody died! Except for me. You know why? ?Cause I had my 

              B        F                        B

train table up, and my seat back in the full upright position, had my 

 F            B         F                         B

train table up, and my seat back in the full upright position, had my

 F             B        F                        B

train table up, and my seat back in the full upright position. Ah ha ha 

                         F F                                           F F

ha! Oh ha ha! Ahhhh. So I crawled from the twisted burnin? wreckage, I 

                                                F F

crawled on my hands and knees for three full days, dragging along my big 

 F                         B                  F                   

leather suitcase, and my garment bag, and my tenor saxophone, and my

 B                                F                       B         

twelve-pound bowling ball and my lucky lucky autographed glow in the dark 

       F                                            B  B        B   B

snorkel. But finally a arrived at the world famous ?Albuquerque Holiday

 F                                                  F F

Inn?, where the towels are oh so fluffy, and you could eat you?re soup 

                                    F F                 

right out of the ashtrays if you wanna, it?s OK their clean. Well I 

 F                                 B                                 F

checked into my room and I turned down the AC and I turned on the spectro

      B                                         F         

vision and I was just about to eat that little chocolate mint on my pillow 

        B                             F           

that I love so very very much when suddenly there?s a knock on the door. 



F                                       F F                     F F

Well now who could that be? I say, ?who is it?? No answer. ?Who is it??

                                                                   F

There?s no answer. ?Who is it!?? They?re not saying anything, so finally I 

                                 F 

go over and I open the door and just as I suspected, it?s some big fat 

    F                                                 F F

hermaphrodite with a flock of seagull?s haircut and only one nostril. Oh

        F F                                 F                       B

man I hate it when I?m right. So anyway he burst into my room and grabbes 

          

my lucky snorkel and I?m like ?hey, you can?t have that! That snorkel has

  F                                                F F

been just like a snorkel to me.? And he?s like ?tough? And I?m like ?give

                  F F                                 F           F

it.? And he?s like ?make me.? And I?m like ?k.? So I grabbed his leg and 

     B            B            F            F            B 

he grabbed my oesophagus and I bit off his ear and he chewed off my 

  B                                          F          F    

eyebrows and I took out his appendix and he gave me a valonic irrigation 

                                      F F

yes indeed you better believe it. And somehow in the middle of it all the 

                            F F                                F F

phone got knocked off the hook, and twenty seconds later I heard a 

                                      F F

familiar voice, and you know what it said, I?ll tell you what it said, it 

                 F       F     B      B      B   F       F    B    B   F

said, ?if you?d like to make a call, please hang up and try again. If you

      F        B        B              F  B                F       F 

need help hang up and then dial you?re operator. If you?d like to make a 

 B      B     B   F       F    B        F        F        B        B     

call, please hang up and try again. If you need help hang up and then dial

       F   B        F Fm7 B Bm7   F       B F F Fm7 B Bm7   F 

you?re operator. In A     -    lbuquerque,   A     -     lbuquerque! Well 

   F                                                F F

to cut a long story short he got away with my snorkel. But I made a solemn 

             F F  

vow right then and there that I would rest, I would not sleep for an 

   F F                                                   F F   

instant until the one-nostriled man was brought to justice. But first I 

                                  F        F              B           B

decided to buy some donuts. So I got in my car and drove over to the donut

             F                                    B                   F

shop and I walked right up to the guy behind the counter and he says ?yah,



wadaya want??

E-13--------11--------------11131618------------------1113-| it ain't per-

B-------------1311--------13--------1816----------1113-----| fect but it'l

G-----------------1311------------------171513--13---------| give you some

D---------------------1310--------------------15-----------| thing to do 

A----------------------------------------------------------| till  you fig

E----------------------------------------------------------| ure it out

             F F                                F F

I said, ? you got any glazed donuts?? He said, ?naaa were all out of 

                       F F                                F F

glazed donuts.? I said, ?well you got any jelly donuts?? He said, ?naaa 

                                     F F      

were all out of jelly donuts.? I said, ?you got any Bavarian cream-filled 

           F F                                                      F F

donuts?? He said, ?naaa were all out of Bavarian cream-filled donuts.? I 



                                          F F

said, ?you got any cinnamon rolls?? He said, ?naaa were all out of 

                     F F                                       F F

cinnamon rolls.? I said, ?you got any apple fritters!?? He said, ?naaa 

                                   F F

were out of apple fritters.? I said, ?you got any bear claws!!?? He said, 



?wait a minute, I?ll go check. 



E------------------------------------------------16-16-18-16-18-18b-|

B-18v----------------------------------------19-19-18---------------|

G------------------------------19-19-21-19-21-21--------------------|

D-----15v---------19-19-21-19-21-21---------------------------------|

A---------19h20h21--21----------------------------------------------|

E-------------------------------------------------------------------|



E-18-16-16-------------------|

B--------18-16-16------------|

G-------------18-18-15-15----|

D---------------------18-18--|

A-------------------------15-|

E----------------------------|

                             F                           F F

Naaa were out of bear claws.? I said, ?well in that case, in that case 

                 F F                                                 F F

what do you have?? He said, ?all I?ve got right now is this box of one 

                               E-24b\-|

                               B------|

dozen starving crazed weasels.?G------| I said, ?OK I?ll take that.? So he

                               D------|

                               A------|

                               E------| 

 F                        B                        F

hands over the box and I open up the lid and the weasels jump out and they 

   B                          F

immediately latch onto my face and start biting me all over ayiyi 

                                              F F                     F F

yiyiyiyi. Oh, oh man they were just going nuts! Their terin? me apart. You

                                                                   F FF

know I think it was just about that time that little ditty started goin?

              B BB                     F FF                 B BB

through my head. I believe it went a little something like this. 

 F  F  F  F   B  B  B  B   F  F  F  F   B  B  B  B   F  F  F  F   B  B  B

?Doooohgetemoffmegettemoffmeooogetemoffgettemoffoooohgetoooohgeooohoooahhh

B   F  F  F  F   B  B  B  B  F F       

hohhhiahhooohahahahhhohhhhh!? I ran out onto the street with these flesh 

       F F                                                   F F

eating weasels all over my face, waiving my arms all around and just 

                                                         F F

runnin? and runnin? and runnin? like a constipated wiener dog. And as luck 

                      F F                                          F F

would have it, that?s exactly when I ran into the girl of my dreams, her

              F F     

name was Zelda. She was a calligraphy enthusiast with a slight overbite 

  F F                                 F F

and hair the colour of strange peaches. I?ll never forget the very first 

                   F F                                              F

thing she said to me, she said, ?hey, you got weasels on your face.? 



                            F F

That?s when I knew it was true love, we were inseparable after that, oh we 

F F                              F F

ate together, we bathed together, we even shared the same piece of mint-

                     F F                              F         

flavoured dental floss. The world was our burrito. So we got married and 

    B                         F                       B 

we bought us a house and had two beautiful children, Nathaniel and 

        F                            F F

Superfly. Oh we were so very very very happy, oh ya. But then one fateful 



night Zelda said to me, she said, ?Sweetie-pumpkin, do you want to join 

                         F FF F B BB          F      B 

the Columbia Record Club??          I said, ?Wooooah hold on now baby, I?m 

 F                       B                        F

just not ready for that kind of a commitment.? So we broke up and I never 

                          F    F     F      F         F Fm7 B Bm7   F 

saw her again but that?s just the way things go, . In A     -    

    F     B   F Fm7 B Bm7   F

lbuquerque,   A     -     lbuquerque! 



E-16-16-16---16-16-16---16------16b16b17b17b17b18b18b-16-13-----------|

B-18-------18---18----18--18-18-18--------------------------16--------|

G--------------------------------------------------------------14-----|

D-----------------------------------------------------------------15--|

A---------------------------------------------------------------------|

E---------------------------------------------------------------------|



E----------------------------------------20p18p16p11-|

B----------------------------------18-16-------------|

G-17-15----18-18-18-16----19-17----------------------|

D------17-------------16-------17--------------------|

A----------------------------------------------------|

E----------------------------------------------------|

                                                        F F

Anyway then things really started looking up for me, because about a week 

                           F F                                   F F

later I finally achieved my life-long dream. That?s right I got me a part 

                                F F

time job at the ?Sizzler.? I even made employee-of-the-month after I put 

                            F F

out that grease-fire with my face. Oh ya everyone was pretty jealous of me 

F F                                    F F

after that. I was getting lota attitude. OK like one time, I was out in 

                       F F                                         F F

the parking lot trying to remove my excess earwax with a golf pencil, when 

                                             F F

I see this guy Marty tryin? to carry a big old sofa up the stairs all by 

                         F F

himself. So I-I say to him, I say, ?hey, you want me to help you with 

    F F                                        F F

that? And Marty he just rolls his eyes and goes, ?nooooo I want you to cut 

                F F                   B          F       F      F     F

off my arms and legs with a chain saw.? So I did. And then he gets all 

  B     B      B       B     F       F       F      F   B   B   B    B

indignant on me, he?s like, ?hey mad I was just being sarcastic.? Well

 F                                                F F

that?s just great, how was I supposed to know that? I?m not a mind reader

                     F F

for crying out loud. Besides now he?s got a really cute nickname ?Torso 

 

      E-20-16-18-17-14-16----------------------------------------|

      B-------------------20-16-18-17-13-15----------------------|

F F   G-------------------------------------19-15-17-17-13-15----|

Boy?. D-------------------------------------------------------15-| So 

      A----------------------------------------------------------|

      E----------------------------------------------------------|



what?s he complaining about? Say that reminds me of another amusing

       F F                                                   F F

anecdote; this guy comes up to me on the street and tells me he hasn?t had

                         F F      

a bite in three days. Well I knew what he meant but just to be funny I

 F F                                               F             F

took a big bite out of his jugular vein, and he?s yelling and screaming

      B

and bleeding all over and I?m like, ?hey come on don?t you get it?? But he

           F       F             F          B         B            F

just kept rolling around on the sidewalk bleeding and screaming, YAHHHH! 

  F      B             F F       

OHHHH! AHHHH! And I?m completely missing the irony of the whole situation, 

F F                                            F F        F F

man some people just can?t take a joke you know? Anyway, um? um? where was 

 F F                             F F                    F F

I? Kinda lost my train of thought. Oh, uh, well oh okay anyway I know it?s 

                                F F

a roundabout way of saying it but I guess the whole point I?m trying to 

           F     B F                         B

make is, I, HATE, SAURKROUT! That?s all I?m really trying to say, and by 

            F                     B                

the way if one day you happen to wake up and find yourself in an 

 F              B                   F                    B

exsulstential quandary full of woeing and self doubt and wrapped with the 

                   F                  B                         F

pain and isolation of you?re pitiful meaningless existence, at least even

                     B                       F        

take a small bit of comfort in knowing that somewhere out there in this 

  B                 F              B          F                   B

crazy old mixed up universe of ours, there?s still a little place, called 

F Fm7 B Bm7   F    B   F Fm7 B Bm7   F       B     F           B

A     - lbuquerque,   A     -     lbuquerque! Albuquerque, Albuquerque,

    F            B           F             B            F

Albuquerque, Albuquerque, Albuquerque, Albuquerque, Albuquerque,

    B               F     B     F     B      F       B       F F B B F F B B

Albuquerque, I say  A, A, L, L, B, B, U, U? QUERQUE! QUERQUE!           

F   F        B   B        F   F        B   B        F    F 

Albuquerque, Albuquerque, Albuquerque, Albuquerque, Albuquerque, 

B   B        F   F        B   B        F   F        B   B

Albuquerque, Albuquerque, Albuquerque, Albuquerque, Albuquerque, 

F   F        B   B        F   F        B   B        F   F    

Albuquerque, Albuquerque, Albuquerque, Albuquerque, Albuquerque,

B   B        F   

Albuquerque, Albuquerque,



E-13-13-11-18-16-13-11-13-11/8-6-8-6-4-------1-1-1-1-|

B--------------------------------------1-----1-1-1-1-|

G----------------------------------------3---2-2-2-2-|

D------------------------------------------1/3-3-3-3-| (drum solo)

A--------------------------------------------3-3-3-3-|

E--------------------------------------------1-1-1-1-|

                           (Belch) 

I'm sorry but the last part I couldn't do because it goes too fast and my fingers are sore. 

So just play a bunch of notes scaling from the 20th fret to the 1st on the D string and play that 

awkward chord with lots of electronic phony stuff attached to it.



Comments, Questions or maybe even Changes (which I highly doubt) send em to